Beloved

When I was younger, I loved watching elderly couples interact. The longevity of their marriage was often unmistakable in the small ways they mirrored each other… their shared mannerisms, precious expressions, and rhythms. Years later now, my husband and I are that elderly couple. We will celebrate forty-seven years of marriage this year. Even so, things are not always smooth sailing. We have learned that it’s the little things that threaten intimate relationship. We often get irritated with one another, disagreeing on the silliest daily tasks, such as how to wash the laundry or how to squeeze the toothpaste tube. I enjoy tent camping, he prefers hotels; I love walking barefoot all day long, he puts his shoes and socks on as soon as he gets out of bed; I like red and he likes green… You get the idea! I am convinced that we are the most complete opposites that could possibly exist on earth. Yet somehow, over the course of nearly half a century, we have grown into that elderly couple that has become, is still becoming, one intimate unit. When we are separated, it is a heart pain that I cannot describe. I miss him terribly, see his face when I shut my eyes, hear his voice, and can almost feel the warmth of his presence. 

Marriage is such a beautifully designed representation of Jesus and His Church. We are sinners, saved by grace alone. We are the complete opposite of Jesus, yet because of His salvation sacrifice, we have been called into a long term, eternal, intimate, becoming-one journey with Him as His bride. Sometimes, just like in an earthly marriage, we neglect to spend intimate time with our bridegroom. Sorrow, depression, regret, fear, worry overtake us. When we fall out of intimacy with Jesus, we isolate ourselves, hide our struggles, become cynical, neglect fellowship, fall prey to the enemy of our souls. Jesus, our faithful bridegroom, our good shepherd, leaves the ninety-nine to rescue the one. He knows the wolf’s tactics, knows our weaknesses, and steps in to woo us back into intimacy with Him. There’s a lot that I have yet to learn about Jesus, but one thing I do know is that His pursuit of His bride is relentless. His pursuit of me hasn’t stopped just because I sometimes get discouraged or neglect to seek Him in my times of fear, distress, rebellion, and isolation. 

Today, as I contemplate the meaning of intimacy with Jesus, I realize that I’ve been missing Him, longing for His warmth, yearning to see His beautiful face, searching for His tender voice, waiting for His return. I am my beloved’s and He is mine. 

Song of Songs chapter 2 (The Message Version is especially beautiful!)